Over the years tenants have said some crazy things not only the ones that are trying to get an apartment from you but ones that are already in your apartment and I was just wondering if we could get a laugh here of what tenants have told you in the past that you could not believe they actually said it so let’s go.

Here are a couple of mine….

Well, I just wanna be honest with you. I pay my bills, but I definitely smoke weed and do you have a problem with that because I like to enjoy my weed.

Got an inquiry the other day.

"I seen that you allow dogs and I have 4 of them I know it’s a lot but I’m running out of options."

* I don't have ANY credit - we pay everything in cash

* My credit was good but my divorce ruined it. (How long were you divorced?) Ten years.

* It was (damaged) like that when I moved in.

A bag of cocaine falls from the ceiling tile in the bath room....tenant says "well .... where is it!"

I had a young lady (mid 20s) lean over in her sexiest pose and say, "Is there anything I can do for you to lower the rent?"

I couldn't keep a straight face and while chuckling said, "I'm sorry there is nothing you can do."

I had another lady call and say, "Hey my car battery died. Do you think you can come over and give me a jump?"

My response, "I think you are confused about the nature of our relationship."

I had a young lady (mid 20s) lean over in her sexiest pose and say, "Is there anything I can do for you to lower the rent?"

I couldn't keep a straight face and while chuckling said, "I'm sorry there is nothing you can do."

I had another lady call and say, "Hey my car battery died. Do you think you can come over and give me a jump?"

My response, "I think you are confused about the nature of our relationship."

I am entering a unit to show it to a prospect and notice the place is a pig sty. Tenant also moved the dining room table up to and blocking the windows. On top of the table there was full of junk. Under the table packed with nonsense. I asked what was going on, a prospect was coming for a showing.

Young Tenant warned me he had a problem and the rent

would be late.

Why I asked ?

He said because the shop gave him 3 days off.

Why I asked ?

Because my sister didn't get me out of bed on time.

Why is that her job, I asked ?

Because she sleeps right next to me.

I know that aint right, I said.

Kid rushes back with, "I told you I have a problem".

While I'm there for something else, I sniff sewer smell and ask about it.

Yeah, we've been smelling that for 2-3 weeks.

A young lady came to my open house a few years ago.

Me: why are you moving?

Her: ...because I have roaches and landlord won't do anything.

Oreo, staging = actually sabotaging. But yeah that's funny. That's why I never show a unit occupied because of the possibility that they could sabotage the perspective tenant's viewing intentionally or unintentionally.

Mick, Yep. Had one disclose she had bedbugs. Don't care who's fault it is.

I give them props for audacity. You never know until you ask. I take the same approach with negotiation. Ask for the stars. Perhaps you'll get the moon. Or not. But if you don't ask, you'll never get.

I asked someone last year to sell me their house for $65K when it was worth $100K "as is" easily if they'd just listed it with a Realtor on MLS. They said "Yes".

I know what it was worth because I flipped it within 29 days for that price.

Crazy?

How about the tenants that tell you “ya my landlord was a scum he did not do this or that and I reported him to the health department…..”

I had a tenant ask if I would pay for an exorcist to come to her house.

After a few questions I realized she meant exterminator not exorcist.

No - he isn't going to be living here - after introducing him as "My Fiancée".

Just remembered one from a couple years ago.

Tenants moved out, left the place in bad shape. I explained that there was a lot of damage, trash, stains and holes in the carpet along with dog urine smell in a closet when they had no dog.

His reply was that I knew it was their first place so this should have been expected.

I told the new tenants: we never allow pets in this apartment

I told the new tenants: we never allow pets in this apartment

I told the new tenants: we never allow pets in this apartment

I told the new tenants: we never allow pets in this apartment