Tough Meeting
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Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) May 12, 2024 9:05 PM
       Tough Meeting (by NE [PA]) May 12, 2024 9:21 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Vee [OH]) May 12, 2024 9:27 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Tim [CA]) May 12, 2024 9:30 PM
       Tough Meeting (by RB [TN]) May 12, 2024 9:36 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) May 12, 2024 9:58 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Small potatoes [NY]) May 12, 2024 10:50 PM
       Tough Meeting (by GKARL [PA]) May 12, 2024 11:11 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Mapleaf18 [NY]) May 13, 2024 1:24 AM
       Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) May 13, 2024 6:59 AM
       Tough Meeting (by Mapleaf18 [NY]) May 13, 2024 7:10 AM
       Tough Meeting (by Mapleaf18 [NY]) May 13, 2024 7:17 AM
       Tough Meeting (by NE [PA]) May 13, 2024 7:46 AM
       Tough Meeting (by ken [NY]) May 13, 2024 8:06 AM
       Tough Meeting (by zero [IN]) May 13, 2024 8:11 AM
       Tough Meeting (by NE [PA]) May 13, 2024 8:16 AM
       Tough Meeting (by plenty [MO]) May 13, 2024 8:30 AM
       Tough Meeting (by Allym [NJ]) May 13, 2024 11:40 AM
       Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) May 13, 2024 11:52 AM
       Tough Meeting (by RB [TN]) May 13, 2024 12:29 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Jason [VA]) May 13, 2024 12:51 PM
       Tough Meeting (by GKARL [PA]) May 13, 2024 1:13 PM
       Tough Meeting (by mapleaf18 [NY]) May 13, 2024 2:15 PM
       Tough Meeting (by mapleaf18 [NY]) May 13, 2024 2:17 PM
       Tough Meeting (by GKARL [PA]) May 13, 2024 3:05 PM
       Tough Meeting (by S i d [MO]) May 13, 2024 3:05 PM
       Tough Meeting (by 6x6 [TN]) May 13, 2024 7:17 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Small potatoes [NY]) May 13, 2024 7:52 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Vee [OH]) May 14, 2024 1:34 PM
       Tough Meeting (by plenty [MO]) May 14, 2024 2:15 PM
       Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) May 20, 2024 1:43 PM

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Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) Posted on: May 12, 2024 9:05 PM
Message:

Applicant screened well herself. She is a 24 Year old Single Mother.

She is relocating out of the area to get away from an abusive relationship. She has a job lined up already. She has Qualifying income, a 702 credit score, good rental history, and almost a perfectly squeaky clean police record. There is an expected custody battle for the four year old.

I asked her, she wanted to move the ninety minutes from her family.

She disclosed BF and she wants to live nearby him. I ask for his name since he will be having a key to the place - allegedly just not moving in.

So we met to go over the hold agreement today. The place has been empty for three days. I give her, her own background package. I also gave her the BFs police dockets...it was a small book. 1 breaking and entering, two disorderly conduct, a stalking charge, An assault', several - about six to eight traffic violations - all within the past five years. The court summary record was five pages long and included criminal, non-traffic, summary offences, and traffic charges.

I made as clear as day - she is approved. If her BF moves in, the two of them are moving out. She said he wasn't moving in and had a hard time understand the stack of papers presented to her - so I pulled no punches. You have a custody battle ahead, the judge is going to ask you why you moved where you did. Without any support system in place, that will reflect badly on you. But with you dating a BF who stays with you sometime having a criminal background - do you think your EX is going to not to use that against you.

I summed it up by saying I am counting on all my tenants to complete the full term of their lease. You might need to make some hard choices ahead. Those choices will not release you from your financial obligations. Your issues will not bleed over to me.

I really hate having a good applicant slip away, but I believe she is going from one bad mistake to a new one. She said she needs to review the stack of court dockets papers on her BF. With the exception of the BF - who isn't going on the lease, she is well qualified on paper. I believe she might be co-dependent in finding another control freak.as a BF.

--24.101.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by NE [PA]) Posted on: May 12, 2024 9:21 PM
Message:

Sheís not a good applicant, let her slip away. Some times people who qualify donít qualify. --24.152.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by Vee [OH]) Posted on: May 12, 2024 9:27 PM
Message:

You will become a surrogate parent to the BF, not a good place to visit - let the aurora above absorb her until Atlantis is discovered in Lake Erie. --184.59.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by Tim [CA]) Posted on: May 12, 2024 9:30 PM
Message:

Everyone who has seen situations like this that all end in a bigger mess than she's already in, please raise your hand. --73.2.xx.xx




Tough Meeting (by RB [TN]) Posted on: May 12, 2024 9:36 PM
Message:

Sounds like a combo of therapy and financial advice,

with a splash of moral values. --69.130.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) Posted on: May 12, 2024 9:58 PM
Message:

Tim - does stuff like this sadden you? Yet there isn't anything we can really do about it. I also believe in free will. --24.101.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by Small potatoes [NY]) Posted on: May 12, 2024 10:50 PM
Message:

Wait, why would you disclose info about the bf? Are you trying to help her not make a bad decision? And how is she a good candidate? Even w out the bf a divorce in progress is drama you don't need and often doesn't end well for the ll. You have a vacancy for 3 days and this looks good? I wouldn't touch this and I have a vacancy for 4 months. Having a job lined up is not the same as having an offer letter w salary. --172.59.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by GKARL [PA]) Posted on: May 12, 2024 11:11 PM
Message:

The BF will be there the first day and from then on out. Gotta pass on that one. Her life is a wreck and that good credit score won't last for long with the shiftless BF around living off her. I don't get these women who want these bad boys. I guess the nice guys are too boring. --209.122.xx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by Mapleaf18 [NY]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 1:24 AM
Message:

In these cases, credit score means nothing. More red flags than a Soviet parade in May. Be careful bc DV victims are a protected claas in housing especially in BLUE states/cities. DV victims don't change their spots. They continue to gravitate toward baby daddy drama.

You won't be able to break the cycle as it is akin to being an addict.

Locally, a woman was attacked by her off again on again boyfriend that she had an RO against but was lured back in. He used a machete and now she has "life altering injuries" after being on the verge of death. --64.246.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 6:59 AM
Message:

for those who are saying don't accept the person, what are your grounds? How can you do this without violating Fait Housing? --24.101.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by Mapleaf18 [NY]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 7:10 AM
Message:

Find something else to DQ her. Does she smoke or vape? What her do her previous landlord references look like if any? 24 years old is pretty young to be starting down this bad road.

Although I have gone down this road myself what I did was work two jobs, live in a slum area D hood until I had enough money saved up to escape far away and this was without any family help nor child support. A lot of these women go after child support from their abuser, which further enrages them and they end up injured or dead. --64.246.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by Mapleaf18 [NY]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 7:17 AM
Message:

Agree with others "job lined up" means nothing. Is she currently working full-time? If not what will happen is her abuser will honeymoon her and love bomb her saying you don't have to work... let me move in with you and I'll pay for you (via nefarious illegal activities).

I find a lot of these women with so-called good credit scores got that way because they have lived off the system yet obtained a TJ Maxx credit card then paid off a few of their bills, which is nice, but it used to be that you couldn't get any credit card if you were on any kind of Public Assistance which is the way it should be.

In my humble opinion there are too many ways to easily get higher credit scores nowadays. It used to be you had to

work for it. Same thing with non STEM college degrees they don't hold much water anymore due to being dumbed down. --64.246.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by NE [PA]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 7:46 AM
Message:

Boyfriendís getting a key. He needs to be screened and on the lease. Smoke em that way. --24.152.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by ken [NY]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 8:06 AM
Message:

she will be trouble. to start with i reject whoever i want to but if you want a reason leaving ara to get away from an abusive relationship,he will find her and show up especially when the court gives him her address, the new boyfriend will be moving in and he is going to treat her the same as the last one.Disqualify for not having a job long enough. Someone should be making a hard decision here and it is you,she isnt capable of making hard decisions --74.77.xx.xx




Tough Meeting (by zero [IN]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 8:11 AM
Message:

Had a wonderful tenant. She was clean, quiet, paid on time, no drama with the other tenants.

Then she got a BF. I started noticing little things changing such as her dog was now scared of me. Before she was a great animal as dogs go. But she wouldn't even come up to me when I went in to work on the place.

Then the BF moved in. He wasn't horrible on paper, but he had a couple spots that were not good. He was not on the lease. Then he started smoking pot in the apartment.

It all went downhill from there. Evicted her because of her decision to stay with him. She couldn't get another place because of his record.

Last I knew she lost her job at the bank and has collections trying to serve her at the old apartment.

I can't control who they fall in love with but I can control who lives in my place. --107.147.xx.xx




Tough Meeting (by NE [PA]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 8:16 AM
Message:

This one was like volleyballs set & spike. 24 yr old single mom is the set. Moving to escape drama is the spike. Hit the road Jack-ie.

I can say that because Iím not a liberal landlord and I have experience. When you know, you know. --24.152.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by plenty [MO]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 8:30 AM
Message:

You aren't thinking well. --172.59.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by Allym [NJ]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 11:40 AM
Message:

She would not have gotten to step two here. No longevity in job. Some employers have six week trial periods and then out if they are not performing and I doubt if she will be able to with all going on around here. --173.61.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 11:52 AM
Message:

Not that we need to add another layer from this meeting, but I showed her when we met, the payment history for the previous fines. Perhaps these could have been his sister, mom and step mom making these payments on his behalf.

I don't think so - I believe he is a hot head and uses people. I believe he is looking for a new sugar momma.

She is a non-smoker. Has a job with qualifying income but has disclosed she will be changing when she moves up here. That is rather typical with a Relo tenant. 702 credit score throws out using credit. The current landlord checks out and conveniently says he is sorry to see the couple go (Cough-cough).

--24.101.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by RB [TN]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 12:29 PM
Message:

They All come with baggage.

How much can ya carry ? --69.130.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by Jason [VA]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 12:51 PM
Message:

Unfortunately after review, your length of time on the job doesnít meet our minimum requirements. --174.193.xx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by GKARL [PA]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 1:13 PM
Message:

Her new BF probably complicated the abusive relationship issue. Prior LL confirmed the BF is there. Deny unless you want to deal with issues. --172.56.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by mapleaf18 [NY]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 2:15 PM
Message:

Even if it isn't the SAME BF, she'll find a new man that does the exact same thing. --64.246.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by mapleaf18 [NY]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 2:17 PM
Message:

I'm also shocked at how many (male) LLs are swayed by a pretty faced female tenant. I've only been back in this biz since late 2019 and already I've run into two prior LLs that were taken in by smiles and dimples. Then they got taken completely (larceny, property damage, unpaid rent). --64.246.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by GKARL [PA]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 3:05 PM
Message:

We all wind up in these situation after culling through very poor applicants, you pull one that looks good in comparison but upon further examination, you've got to flex to get them in the place. This is where this forum is good as it stiffens our spines and forces us to see things more objectively. We all need that occasionally. --209.122.xx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by S i d [MO]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 3:05 PM
Message:

"for those who are saying don't accept the person, what are your grounds? How can you do this without violating Fait [sic] Housing?"

Response:

"Unfortunately, we are unable to approve your application at this time. For further explanation, please send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to 123 Anywhere Ave. Allows 3-4 weeks for processing."

Never had one come in since starting this game in 2005. They KNOW. I don't need to tell them.

Also, the rule is the less said the better.

Sometimes, with NEGATIVES, you gotta go with your gut. We've all been around people who just don't "feel" right, but you can't quite put your finger on it. Everyone starts out unapproved. It's their job to convince me to approve them. getting that negative vibe is huge. Sort of like hanging around people who just talk too much about everything. Nothing wrong or illegal about that, but it's just... exhausting! I don't want to deal with someone who is going to give me a 15 minute life story every time I ask one question. And that's my choice. "Talks too much" is not a protected class.

Never go with the gut on positives: those require evidence. --184.4.xx.xx




Tough Meeting (by 6x6 [TN]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 7:17 PM
Message:

Thank you for sharing this, Ray.

I kind of liked the way you handled it. She applied, she qualified, you then found out that she had a current boyfriend that she was meeting at the new location, you got the name of the boyfriend, checked his records, was honest in explaining things to her, gave her some words of wisdom to think about, and put the ball in her court.

We all know that when a single young person moves in, there will likely be another come along at some point. So, the question becomes, is it better to find out who that person is sooner, or later?

It is always good to learn from others experiences and I especially like it when it is examples in present tense.

6x6

--76.129.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by Small potatoes [NY]) Posted on: May 13, 2024 7:52 PM
Message:

I would not have moved forward without having at least many months at current job, my min is one year. In my B building I accept job offer letters from hospital interns and graduating grad students, etc. In C rentals I ask for guarantor. What happens if this woman quits or gets fired from her new job? No current job or not much time at an existing job are valid reasons to deny. --172.59.xxx.x




Tough Meeting (by Vee [OH]) Posted on: May 14, 2024 1:34 PM
Message:

Send her over to Ohio to get lottery tickets, then sell her a place where you won't be doing service calls, she gonna have a lot and then the BF will start calling them in. --184.59.xxx.xx




Tough Meeting (by plenty [MO]) Posted on: May 14, 2024 2:15 PM
Message:

I guess I object to the magic 8 ball and future predictions and the "dad" speech. Suddenly now her issues are your. Without the knowledge it would all be in her to resolve and "hide" now that you know, this one will keep you watching closely. Sometimes it works out the old boy friend will contact her and not be so happy she is doing well and like The Dr Phil Show will drag her back down. Standby! --172.59.xxx.xxx




Tough Meeting (by Ray-N-Pa [PA]) Posted on: May 20, 2024 1:43 PM
Message:

hope all is well with her. I haven't heard anything and the place is occupied with someone with a 735 credit score. They are bouncing back from a bad relationship - the difference is they are not co-dependent on the bad actor.

Sometimes we all get involved with someone who isn't there all the way. Stating the facts, (sometimes even repeating the same fact up to three times if they are rationalizing the bad behavior), allows them to keep the badge that they earned while drawing a line in the sand.

Example:

LL - You don't qualify with the three DUIs you have had

Applicant - The police are out to get me.

LL - You have had three DUIs, Clearly Alcohol is not your friend.

Applicant - I only drink on the weekends.

LL- Let me phrase this this even clearer, you have had 3 DUIs. Alcohol is not your friend. Have a nice day.

I have dealt with lots of 18-25 years old while I was in uniform. It can be tough to weed thru excuses vs reasons

--24.101.xxx.xxx



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