Canned answers to questions has saved me so many times. It's vital that a beginning landlord develop an arsenal of canned responses as soon as possible.

Looking back now, I wish somebody had given me a list of 100 questions that I could draw from the hat and just to practice with and have an answer ready to go right then and there. Develop those answers and stick with them.

When you're in the heat of the moment, sometimes you can studder step and get yourself into a sticky situation. Can we paint? Can we garden? Can my friend move in? Can I have a horse? And on and on and on.

Jeffrey, this might even be a good round table for the convention. A bucket full of pre-written questions that the roundtable folks can answer.

Shooting from the hip.

Maybe even a competition at the front of the room!

Friday at 1pm, we have "canned responses hour!"! Haha.

For anything the lease doesn't allow (i.e. can we paint, can we attach a satellite dish to the roof, can we have a pit bull, etc.) the simplest answer is the best:

"Our lease doesn't allow that."

It's the truth, and you don't owe them an explanation. If they argue any more than perhaps a quickly, playful "awe shucks, isn't there anything we could do?"....I chalk it up to uncooperative tenants who will not honor the lease, and they just screened themselves out.

For anything that's a "gray" area:

"I'll have to check with the owners."

My lease is pretty detailed and there are few gray areas.

95% of the questions I get are either "Yes", or "Our lease doesn't allow that." I used to say, "I'm sorry, but unfortunately our lease doesn't allow that..." Then I realized something: I am neither 'sorry' nor is the fact our lease doesn't allow these behaviors 'unfortunate.' We don't allow those things for a very specific reason.

"I will have to get back to you on that"

"I will have to ask my boss about that"

"It's out of my hands,it's company policy"

"Please read the lease"

I prefer a little more personal integrity.

"NO" is better than "The lease doesn't allow". Its me who doesn't allow, so why not say so, be ready to discuss the matter honestly and directly, and be willing to listen to reason (but based on experience).

I fought in Sinai in 1967. In that same place, my people were told, "Thou shalt not lie".

I prefer to live my life that way.

Moshe, that's a wierd response but okay.

"I don't allow that." "Why not?" And now you've got to give them a whole explanation of why not: former tenant horror stories, blah blah blah.

Or you just say, "I just don't." And you come across as brusque and rude and arbitrary.

You put it in the lease for a reason, but you don't owe the tenant that reason. It is what it is.

The canned response to 101 tenant questions is "no."

If a tenant asks something odd where you've never thought about the issue, the answer is "let me think abut that for a couple of days."

" And now you've got to give them a whole explanation of why not: former tenant horror stories, blah blah blah "

Is that such a problem?

"It never works out well, spilled paint, I can't depend that tenants repaint adequately, I would have to charge you price of bringing in professional painter to restore, they are unavailable at beginning of month, I would have to charge double to get someone to come and work for me on short notice on 1st of month, sorry. "

If I couldn't handle a task like this facily, I shouldn't be in the business. I take only tenants with whom I can reason, and I give the same in return.

No.

No.

No.

What you do now will be permanent but you will be gone in as little as a year. It won't be fair to the next tenant. You would have to pay NOW to change it back to the way it was.

It may be your home but it is my house. It will be my house after you are long gone.

Let me see pictures of the garden at your present home.

NO is the best. Whats wrong with it?

I DON'T ALLOW is just as good.

Whats wrong with "I" if you're the one that made the policy?

Whats wrong with being honest? What kind of relationship do you have/want with your tenant?

I'm not very good at thinking on my feet, and I really dislike confrontation, so my standard response is, "Hmm. I don't know. I'll check with my boss."

Well, technically "I" didn't make the policy's. They've all been adopted from other landlord's and attorneys.

"I" need to check with "them" at times.

Robin, my meaning is not one of how to answer, but my own basic integrity in answering truthfully whithout guile. The issue for me is that I am straightforward with my tenants, I don't lie, I don't try to deceive or mislead. While a landlord can certainly get what he wants by prevaricating, I feel it beneath my personal standards to do so. I come from the land of the Bible, and I think about that seriously.

NE, while my decision is formed and landlords, attorneys and experience, my POLICY is my own. I own it, I admit to it, I am proud of it and I don't need to blame "them".

I'm with Moshe here. I answer honestly and quickly. I talk to my tenants. I have a "rapport" with them. I don't text brusque messages. I don't tack or mail letters without a conversation first. I accept responsibility.

I like the idea of having canned responses in your 'pocket'. I have decided next vacancy my canned response to, can you lower the rent.....I would certainly consider it for someone who is VERY well qualified. So if they have a 720 credit score and are willing to sign a 3 year lease I would consider a rent decrease.

Laura, whats the matter with "YES" or "NO" in your pocket?

" I'm not Shawn " would have been a good response. Its honest, straightforward and doesn't admit of a rational response.

My disagreement is not with the response being canned. It what is put into the can. Honesty is always the best policy,

But remember I think we are talking prospective tenants here, not current residents. I don't need to explain all our policies to every applicant. Let them get approved first, THEN we can talk at length about things.

But remember I think we are talking prospective tenants here, not current residents. I don't need to explain all our policies to every applicant. Let them get approved first, THEN we can talk at length about things.

Argh I hate when that double and triple post happens!

Some of my canned responses:

Can we paint? No please decorate and add color with pillows and fabric and art.

Can I get a dog? We are pet-friendly but must approve of each animal on a case by case basis. No aggressive animals, and all animals must be spayed or neutered.

Can my parents or friends come stay with me in the summer sometimes? We aren't going to monitor who is staying here per se, but anyone who actually lives here must be on the lease.

And so on...

Totally disagree with an "I" approach. It is often not to the landlord's advantage to set themselves up as the "bad" guy. In a perfect world, where everyone always responds in a reasonable manner, that approach may make sense. However, everyone does not always respond in a reasonable manner. And the ones who may not be reasonable may not even be your residents, but friends, relatives or acquaintances of your residents or future residents (who you had no say in selecting.

When I purchased a large apartment complex, it had lots of deferred maintenance. I had limited funds and had to take care of important issues like leaking faucets, leaking drains, unsafe or dangerous things like loose stairway railing. So when a tenant wanted a "new dishwasher", I had to respond, "I need to ask my partner first, before I can give you a defiant answer"!

Then the next day I told the tenant I have to "try to fix the dishwasher before my partner would allow me to replace it". And of course it was something simple like a clogged inlet water filter. Without the right amount of water the dishes couldn't get clean.

NE,

Some thoughts...

I sayTHE lease rather than my lease.

Every policy or problem I’ve had or can think of (with the help of my wonderful friends here) is written in the lease. That’s why it’s 29 pages long!! Paper is cheaper than problems.

Company policy. My business is more than just me. I run this like a business not a Mom&Pop hobby. Wifey, Maintenance, Bookkeeper, Housekeeper, Bank, IRS...all are a part of my biz. Decisions are made with input from all and to benefit all, not just me.

Appropriate. I try to speak their language and answer what they are really asking. It’s like when a child asks where babies come from. We give an age appropriate answer. Some don’t need the ENTIRE explanation!

Understandable. Some people just like to argue and challenge authority. But they understand, accept, and remain calm when I say “company policy”. It helps them continue or move on.

Your post reminds me I need to add more FAQs to my website to HELP prospects!

BTW Often the answer to their questions is YES- “Yes you can get a dog / roommate / shed / garden...as long as you follow the company’s policy. “

Paint: yes, as long as you hire our painter.

I do as Blue does. I'll say "Unfortunately I am not allowed to make an exception. I have to treat everyone the same due to discrimination laws."

I never get push back from that. All tenants will push at some point for special treatment. You can't give special treatment.

.....OUR policy

and

......I will get back with you on that.

It is ever so easy for me to say I was in a mine field during the original gulf war. That is a very true statement.....but the reality was WE were in a mine field together. Not too many things are truly one person operations in life - it takes a team.

When do do hits the fan, I believe its natural to take it personally....even when it is not in your best interest.

If anyone is running things like you are the lone ranger, things are going to be rough for you.

The good news - the race is long and everyone can stop rest up and improve the way they do business.

Thank you Moshe -for answering the call for your nation!